


May you walk among the stars of morning

by donnawanderedoff



Category: The 100 (TV), kabby - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Kabby, Kabby christmas week, Light Angst, christmas poems
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-26
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-09-12 11:23:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9069382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donnawanderedoff/pseuds/donnawanderedoff
Summary: Marcus had been rather withdrawn for the last couple of days. When Abby presses him for a reason, it's not what she expected.





	

**Author's Note:**

> A rather late contribution to the fifth day of the Kabby Christmas week. I've decided to go for the angst in this one, nothing too strong and it's filled with some cuteness as well but still, prepare for some emotions.

For the past couple of days, Marcus had been withdrawn and Abby has no idea as to why. They were in the middle of the preparation of their first Christmas, or more specifically their first Christmas party on the ground and even though Marcus had been one to persuade her in organizing a party, insisting that they all deserved some fun, he rapidly lost his initial enthusiasm and fervour. Over the past three days, Abby had barely seen him. When she woke up, he’d already be gone, his spot in the bed cold, off to train the new guards. And at night, he’d crawl into bed a couple hours after her. She’d stir as he’d position himself behind her, spooning her while dropping a gentle kiss on her head before drifting off to sleep.

Abby hadn’t been the only one who had taken notice of Marcus’ strange behaviour. Bellamy had dropped by two days ago while she’d been in medical. She had at first feared that something had happened because the young man had seemed nervous and uncomfortable. After some coaxing from her, Bellamy had confessed that he’d been worrying about Marcus. According to him, Marcus had seemed distant and unfocused during guard duty, which was something that never happened. Trying not to show her concern, Abby had promised the boy that there was nothing seriously wrong with Marcus and if she knew something, she’d make sure to tell him as well. At Bellamy’s obvious relief that it wasn’t anything serious and his worry for Marcus, Abby felt a surge of affection course through her, both for Bellamy as for his relationship with Marcus.

And today after one of their meetings, Marcus had immediately taken off, claiming something about conflicting shifts in the new timetable for the guards, while he usually stayed behind with her until they were the only ones left in the council room. Being the leaders of the camp didn’t really come with a lot of spare time, so they tried to use every opportunity they could, to spend some time together. Which meant that his rapid departure has caused some raised eyebrows and Clarke had cornered her, asking if anything was amiss. Abby had tried to shrug it off by telling her daughter that Marcus was just busy and there was no need for worry. She could tell Clarke didn’t believe her but her daughter also realized that pushing her mother wouldn’t help, she’d just given her a comforting hand squeeze before leaving. 

Not knowing how to address the change in his behaviour, but knowing that she should, Abby lets her gaze flicker over the room. There are only two people currently confined to bed rest, but they weren't in need of urgent medical assistance, just some sleep and rest. Glancing at the clock, she calculates that Marcus should normally be in their quarters, going over some paperwork before dinner. Making up her mind, Abby crosses the room to where Murphy’s reading up on some medical texts. After he’d shown his potential in Polis, he’d been training with her and he had been doing a great job so far.

“I’m thinking about leaving early. Jackson will relieve you in about an hour if that’s alright with you”, Abby says, causing the boy to lift his head.

“You sure that’s wise? Trusting me to look after those two?”, Murphy asks sardonically with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh, I believe you’re more than capable of handling them”, she resolutely replies.

Her quick response and obvious trust seems to surprise him, but after staring at her for a couple of seconds, Murphy merely gives her a quick nod before returning his focus on the texts.

* * *

Abby has just arrived at their quarters when the door flies open and Marcus rushes out, halting when he notices her standing in the corridor.

"Abby? Shouldn't you be in medical? Did something happen?", he frowns, concern lacing his voice. 

"No, nothing's wrong Marcus. Things were slow and I decided to surprise you, seeing as that you left so quickly after the meeting earlier", she reassures him, observing how a look of unease flits across his face at the mention of the meeting. 

"Ah, well the thing is", he rubs his neck in a nervous manner, "I actually have to be somewhere. Don't worry it won't take long and I'll be in time for dinner, I promise", he replies before giving her a quick peck on her lips. 

As he moves to walk past her, Abby quickly reaches out and grabs one of his hands, halting his departure. 

"Is something the matter Marcus?", she implores, causing his head to turn so their eyes lock. 

"Why would something be the matter?", he answers, trying to sound reassuring but failing when he's unable to maintain eye contact and pulls his hand back. 

Abby simply levels one of her glares at him and crosses her arms. "Why? Perhaps because I have barely seen you these past three days? Because you've been withdrawn? Or haven't shown your usual commitment when discussing the party even though it was basically your idea? And don't tell me that I've been imagining things because I haven't been the only one who has noticed your behaviour, Marcus. People are worried about you. Worried that something's wrong and I can't tell them with absolute certainty that everything's okay because it almost seems as if you've been avoiding me. Are you? Have I done something wrong?", she wonders, tears filling her eyes. The thought that she was somehow responsible for this change or that he perhaps was having second guesses about the two of them had been running through her mind.

"What? Abby no. _No_ , I promise, you have done nothing wrong", Marcus moves to stand in front of her, assuring her as he cups her cheek, wiping away a tear. 

"Then what is it, Marcus?", she pleads, hating the way her voice trembles. 

His eyes show his inner turmoil as if he's not sure he should tell her or not. "Do you trust me?" 

"Of course, I do", she knits her brows. 

Giving her a nod, he steps back into their quarters and emerges after a couple of seconds with her scarf and a pair of mittens. "Put these on, I know it doesn't make any sense right now, but you deserve to know the truth. So I'd like to show you"

Even though Abby's feeling confused, she does trust him, thus she puts both the scarf and mittens on. Marcus then proceeds to grab one of her hands and starts to walk towards the exit of the building. When they're outside, Abby can't suppress the little shiver that travels through her body at the cold, causing Marcus to wrap the scarf firmer around her neck before grabbing her hand again. They start to make their to the front gates, which are opened by the guards on duty without a single word, both of the guards give them a respectful nod as they pass. 

* * *

 After walking for at least twenty minutes at a brisk place and in complete silence, Abby opens her mouth to ask if it's still far when Marcus abruptly comes to a halt. Not expecting this, Abby nearly trips in her haste to stop as well. 

"Are we th-", Abby begins only to cut herself off when she notices what's in front of them.  

"Is that?", she wonders amazed.

"Yes, it's the Eden tree", Marcus confirms, keeping his gaze on the tree.

"I didn't even know it made its way down to earth", she admits softly, not believing her eyes. It almost seemed like a miracle that the tree had survived both the crash to the ground and the harsh weather they've been having lately. 

"After my mother died, I vowed to myself that if I'd be ever given the opportunity to reach the ground I'd take the tree with me and plant it. It's what my mother would have wanted and this way a part of her still lives on", he mutters softly, the pain at the loss of his mother clear in his voice. 

"The reason I've come off reserved these past few days is because -", he clears his throat", "the tree's dying and nothing I've tried so far has helped", he says, his voice cracking and wavering under the onslaught of emotions he's feeling. Abby wordlessly squeezes his hand and he flashes her a grateful look before turning his gaze on the tree once more.

"The tree is the only thing I have left of her and I don't know if I'm ready to give that up", he confesses as he stares at the tree. 

"Marcus", Abby whispers after a couple of seconds, gently tugging on this hand until he turns his head towards her. His eyes are filled with tears, his jaw set and she can feel her heart clench at the obvious pain he's in. She turns her body so she's completely facing him before tugging hid hand again, pulling him slightly forward and catching him as he falls against her. He's breathing harshly, still trying to contain the tears. 

"It's okay Marcus. It's _okay_ ", she softly soothes him, running one hand through his hair while the other rubs comforting circles on his back as she feels him tremble beneath her touch. Her heart aches when he lets out a broken sigh before sobs wrack through his body as he wraps his arms around her too and he clings to her.

As Abby holds him and tries to comfort him, she realizes that this is probably the first time that he had let himself mourn the loss of his mother. There hadn't been time for that on the Ark and after they landed on the ground, well, it's not like they had a lot of spare time. No wonder that Marcus has retreated into himself when the tree had started to die. Abby, just as everybody else on the Ark, had always connected the tree with Vera Kane, so it was natural that Marcus would make the same connection, even more so because he was her son. 

She doesn't know how long they stand there, locked in an embrace but after a while, the sobs lessen until they're reduced to heavy intakes of air. Leaning back a bit, Abby reaches out with a feather-light touch in order to gently wipe away his remaining tears. Marcus leans into her caress and turns his head, expressing his gratitude by pressing a soft kiss to the palm of her mitten. 

"Thank you Abby and I'm sorry for worrying you and the others", he croaks, causing her to shake her head. 

"It's already forgotten Marcus. Next time please just tell me whatever's bothering you", she insists and he gives her a nod in response. 

"You know, my mother used to recite a poem around Christmas time, it was always the same poem, every single year. By the time I was eleven or twelve I'd been so tired of hearing the same poem and even when I begged her to pick another one, she'd tell me that when I got older I would understand the meaning and truly appreciate it. At the time I shrugged it off because nothing in the poem made any sense but she wouldn't budge.  She was stubborn like that", he reminisces with a chuckle. 

"Reminds me of someone I know", Abby teases, earning herself another chuckle. 

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Nonetheless, it seems that she was right because, after everything that has happened, I  _finally_ understand after all those years why she liked the poem so much. Would you like to hear it?", he wonders, gazing at her intently. 

"I'd like that", she whispers and Marcus gives her a soft smile before returning his gaze to the tree, holding her hand. Taking a deep breath, he opens his mouth before starting to recite:

_“May you walk among the stars of morning, Eden waiting silent for the dawn,_

_Ready to unravel without warning, Restless with the urge to be reborn._

_Years of longing pale into beauty, Christmas is a never-realized dream._

_However much devoted to your duty, Remember that the flow is not the stream._

_In my heart you wear a crown of glory, so radiant that time must turn away._

_The vision rises from the untold story, more lovely than what sees the light of day._

_As you can never know just who you are, so let my love become your eastern star.”_

As the last word trails off into the air, they continue to look at the tree while remembering Vera Kane. 

"That was beautiful Marcus", Abby whispers, breaking the silence.

"Vera would have been so proud of you. For making sure that the tree made it down to earth, for planting it and trying to keep it alive. But also for trying your best to keep everybody alive, for working so hard to ensure everybody's safety even when the people didn't want your help. For not giving up", she pledges. 

Marcus turns his head and he gives her a look filled with so much affection and love that her breath hitches. Being loved by Marcus Kane is a heady feeling and it is a feeling she never can get enough off. Cupping her cheek, he leans down and gives her a soft kiss. 

"I love you", he breathes against her mouth. 

"I love you too"

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and/or kudos are much appreciated


End file.
